May 24, 2011

The Business of Authenticity

Here's the thing about dreaming. You can dream to hide those things in your soul that need your attention but are too scary to face. That sort of dreaming will take you on a ride that seems like real life; as if you're truly living. It feels real. It's probably fun and full of activity or it's quiet but painless; actually a little numb. And you are subconsciously aware of that but choose to go on. It's ok. It's timing, it's where you are. Just know eventually you will wake up. and you do. It happens one day (and you'll know it when you do) in the midst of where these actions took you, that life you built around you, to find that you're someone else completely. That those things your soul was asking of you are still very much there and wanting your love and action. They just can't be ignored because they ARE you. 

So you realize this and wonder how the hell to make that work in this life you mustered up to hide from those things in the first place. (insert map here...I know...stick with me) Do you start over? Do you try to make it work? But how can others possibly understand? How do you move forward? In a sense, through growth and love, who cares, yes...all answers respectively....This is usually the time of panic, fear, darkness, sadness, confusion but remember that it is a shift. It is all a shift and everything will be alright. Just breathe, let it in, feel it, and know that this is you so express it. 

There there's the dreaming you actually manifest when you're wide awake. Ah, that's the best because you're authentic to the moment. You're breathing in the freshest air and you don't have to apologize because it's all pure and honest and real This is a consciousness that is more visualizing realizty than 'dreaming' to escape. Such a big difference. They may feel the same; that's the tricky partk but only you know whether you're hiding or leaving it all out there for the world to see and for you to feel it's presence. 

So here I am. In the midst of this discovery and shedding new skin. I am being authentic to myself, to the world around me. It's a practice. You can't just 'get it' one day and move on. It's a series of waves and you fear, get excited, fear again, relish, all in one breath sometimes. It's life. It's you. 

I'm learning to release those energies. That which is inside must come out - nice. But it's true. Show yourself and love it. All of it. No one's watching. No one can judge and do anything to you. It's just you. Be happy. Be silly. Love. Cry. Dance. Sing. Sing some more. Love yourself. 

I'm just starting this blog thing and my intent is to share my 'humanness' with you. Hopefully you'll find it helpful and inspiring for yourself - you may not. Maybe tomorrow. When you're ready. I'll be here writing, sharing, living...being. 


  1. Wow!!! I want to read again...munch on these words...maybe get to see what you are 'seeing'. Thank you! Keep it going, and thank you for sharing these intimacies with me, and others(?). So neat!

  2. Hola! These two posts are ...wonderful! There's a lot there for me to munch on, and to learn, and to incorporate. tears rolled this morning as I read. and yes, I want to "wake up" too! All those dreams are so hurtful, aren't they?

    Hug! Keep it up. Keep writing, sharing, living...I'll take a ride on that!...and maybe, just maybe...join you in being! takes a lot of practice for me! You lead the way, ok?

  3. Thinking of you...Spent time with Rita yesterday as she helped us with he move, and she says and sends her regards. Big hug!